Me: Howdy Prodigal!
Prodigal: I was just thinking of you.
Me: Well, here I am.
Prodigal: Are you going to share?
Me: Of course.
I have the privilege to hear people’s stories at times and God uses these stories to encourage me. Today with her permission, I will share some of the story of Sharon.
Sharon had a hard life. It was tough as a child because instead of parents who loved most of the time, these parents hurt deeply at times. Sharon does know the love and salvation of Jesus and that has made all the difference.
Sharon has attempted suicide and has been hospitalized 24 times. One of these attempts was so serious that the paramedics pronounced her dead when they arrived at her apartment. They were able to revive her and she then recovered in the hospital.
Sharon told me of a time when God finally was able to show her that He loved her. She then wrote this right after it became real that she was loved.
I have begun to believe that “Jesus”-“God” loves me. Its not how much I love Him, it’s how much He loves me. It seems that His love is so magnificent it is almost unbearable. The pain in knowing His love knocks my body to my core.
Is this the great awakening I came here for? I had it all backwards. I knew how much I loved Him, I didn’t know how much He loves me. There is no struggle. There is only God’s love.
My first memory is singing praises to Jesus. I was proud. My major adversity has been my pride and arrogance.
I had to fall. I’ve lived a long life in order to come to my knee’s and want to fall on my face with the power, the knowledge of His grace and His love for me.
A song is playing on my radio. Jesus saves “yes” Jesus saves. He also is the greatest love I have or ever will have.
Wow, I can barely contain the emotions I am having! Embrace the pain within. I am alive! I am loved! I am here! He is with me always!
I wanted love from human beings. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been told “I’m sorry I can’t love you the way you need to be loved. It wasn’t that they didn’t want to, it was that they didn’t have the love in them.
God loves me the way I need to be loved. I feel it all over. In every fiber of my being.
This love is for everyone.
This is God’s world! Right Now! Maybe from the beginning of time, mankind has been running from the pain of letting go. The world does not belong to us. I tried to make it mine.
I realize that every time I think I have the answer, I turn on the TV, read an article in the magazine. I realize that the answer has already been found. It’s already been done.
I love you, O LORD, my strength.
Jennifer Van Allen
Sharon has not attempted suicide since this letter. She has not been hospitalized either.